How To Turn 21

I turn 21 today. Imagine that. 21 years ago, I didn't exist! There was no such person as "me". Life is a miracle. Actually, ALL of life is a miracle, so when people started making such a big deal about me turning 21, I got really uncomfortable. I mean, it's just an age. It's just a milestone, but it's not real in the sense that it's inevitable. Whether I do anything or not, my birthday will come and go.

Am I a different person from yesterday? In fact, am I different person from a few months ago? I might be, or I might not be. The sense of measured time is something that doesn't really click with me.

Anyway, in the end, I turned 21, whether I liked it or not. My friends organized a nice dinner for me yesterday. I really appreciate the effort. I'm happy not because I'm 21, but because I have friends like them. And at work too, my colleagues and bosses threw together a small something for me, and that was nice. And then I come home, and my dad orders in my favourite food, and we have a nice dinner. Like I said, it's not me turning 21 that makes me happy, it's the people.

But why can't people be like this everyday? I don't know, I guess we as a society just need to set aside some days for people...so that they can be appreciated.

I'm the centre of attention sometimes, but I WORK HARD to be the centre of that attention. So when just because I turn 21, people start paying attention to me, I feel weird as shit.

So what to do? Hmm, I'm gonna pull a stunt. Will get back to you when I actually do it. For now, I'm 21, it was inevitable, I'm happy for all the well-wishes, and that's about it!

How To Get A Laptop

I finally got my own laptop! It's an X42J, by ASUS. Okay, I won't pretend as if I know a single thing about laptops. The desktop I have been using at home has not been upgraded since 4 years' ago, and it suited me just fine. A desktop that old...compared to the laptops/desktops of today, probably has archaic specs.

I did what I know how to best: leverage on the knowledge of other people. You know the saying: If you stand on the shoulders of giants, you're not that short, or something like that.

I went with one of my friends to FUNAN first and he gave me a rundown on the basics of laptop specs. Basically, RAM determines how work your computer can handle. The processor determines it's speed. Hmm, that's about all I remember haha.

Next, I went to the IT fair. It was horribly crowded. (You can play the "penis" game, if you want) but the thing is, it really is cheaper over there. Also, they throw in plenty of freebies your way, and if you talk to the sales person nicely enough, they can slice the price down even further. I went there on Saturday and brought home a bunch of flyers.

Then finally, I discussed with my Dad, who was buying the laptop for me about our budget, and what are the best laptops we can get with the budget. And then, we went together to the IT fair on Sunday and looked around. After heading over to the DELL booth, the ACER booth, and the ASUS booth, we finally settled on an ASUS.

And yeah, just like that, I finally got a laptop. I'm freaking thankful for it. I'm watching TV and using the computer. How cool is that? My birthday is coming, and that's why I got this laptop. I don't just get laptops randomly, hahaha.

Okay, that's it for me. Happy Monday.

How To Donate To Charity

Hello all. The recent earthquake that shook Japan really really affected me.

It's partly because I have a soft spot for Japan. I love most things Japanese. Their food is tasty, their mangas are good, their games are tops, their woman are beautiful, and their culture is profound and deep. They seem like a genuinely nice bunch of people. They may have been fuckers back in the 1940s, but now, they're alright.

So when the earthquake struck them, I couldn't help but think that..."They don't deserve to be struck by an earthquake, man," But then again, that's life for you. Life happens, sometimes, without explanations. It's like how we can't stop the rain from falling, or the sun from shining. Sometimes, things just happen.

There's been an outpouring of grief and sympathy online, on facebook, on twitter, and all. It's good, but I doubt it's enough. Japan's not gonna rebuild itself on words, prayers, thoughts. Don't get me wrong; your sentiments are appreciated. I'm sure if I'm in Japan right now, it'll touch my heart that the whole world is on our side. But if you really want to help, you can make a monetary donation at: www.ifrc.org.

IFRC, or the International Federation for Red Cross and Crescent Societies for long, is the international umbrella under which all Red Cross and Crescent arms fall under. They accept international credit cards. Spare Japan some money! Consider all the free manga, porn, games that you have "ripped" from Japan...a small sum isn't too much to ask for. Billions of dollars in damages man. Check out this pictures:






Yeah, it's pretty bad. I'm gonna go on a rant here for awhile, about two things: #prayforjapan, and priorities.

I'm getting sick of this #prayforjapan thing. I'm not religious at all, and I'm happy I'm not. I don't force myself upon other people, but sometimes, I can't get behind their thought process at all. So you want to #prayforjapan...but isn't it HIS fault in the first place? I'm sure in Japan, there's a fucking shitload of people praying everyday that they will be safe and that they will see tomorrow, and that there WON'T be an earthquake. But did HE listen? No.

So really, at the end of the day, what's the point of praying? As far as I'm concerned, praying is the same thing as wishing. The only difference is that there is no lamp and there is no genie and there is no magic carpet.

Now let me let off some steam about another subject. Priorities. I posted the IFRC link on Facebook yesterday morning. But nobody 'liked' it (but for one person, she's the best). Nobody even 'commented' on it. I first posted it yesterday morning, but I reposted it yesterday evening when more people were online. Still, no reaction. WTF.

The other day, I posted this up: Facebook asks me what's on my mind and what I'm planning, knows who all my friends are, and asks me to check in from time to time. Facebook is my girlfriend.

That got 15 'likes'. My post about how to help Japan? Nothing. Fuck. What's wrong with this world. Does nobody care much? Or is it that...people pray, and they think that that's enough?

I don't have any answers. #hopeforjapan

How To Be Thrifty

I spent...a shit load of money today.

For lunch, my boss and my other colleague went for a jog around the City Hall area. From our Admin Building, we headed over to City Hall, past the Memorial Park and finally Esplanade. It's not that far a distance. For anyone. Especially for me. But my boss doesn't exercise that much, though the run was her idea.

So they cut their run short, and got lunch, while I ran around a bit more, reaching Marina Bay Sands. I asked my boss to just get me whatever she's getting, which wasn't such a smart choice.

She got a $7.50 SALAD. And it was take-away. Sigh. I try not to spent more than $5 for lunch nowadays. $7.50...especially when I don't even get to enjoy the pleasures of the restaurant feels kinds much.

And then I had dinner with two friends from my army days. One of them is working for his dad, and he was in a splurging mood, so I felt obliged to spend along with him. It's not like I'm NOT earning money. Actually, I am. But I currently have this...scarcity mindset. I can enjoy myself no matter what, so why not enjoy myself on the cheap?

Spent almost $20 for dinner at this restaurant at Marina Square. It's called...Hippopotamus Restaurant Grill. It's not bad...their main courses range from $18-$30, and they have set meals for about $21, which includes a main course, and three delicious sides. I had this Blue Cheese Hippo Burger, which wasn't too good, but that might be because I had the Blue Cheese.

That's dinner...and then I had to buy black dress pants and a belt for something I'm going for tomorrow. I already bought the cheapest one there is at the market. Went to G2000, and just got a standard belt and standard pants, and that adds up to almost $90. What the.

Spending your own money hurts. I haven't asked money from my parents since I enlisted into the army. And I don't intend to start doing so soon.

This day was an exception. Most days, I eat a cheap lunch, and try not to eat an expensive dinner. I treat myself once in a while, but...I realize now that that's not the most important thing in life. If you're not sure about whether to get something or not...DON'T.

And I've been using an Expense Manager App on my Android phone, which has been of great help to me. I can basically keep track of all my spending so long as I remember to key it in my phone. To those who don't have that app, download it, it's free!

Kay, I'm going off. Happy Friday!

How To Heal A Broken Heart

My heart literally hurts. And when I mean 'literally', I do mean 'literally'. Recently, I've been having some form of chest pain. It's not something that I feel only when I exercise, but in my day to day activities too. It's starting to worry me. It got so bad that during my run today, I stopped half-way and just walked home.

I don't know what's going on, and it kind of scares me. Maybe it's my eating habits. I'll try working on that and then maybe this pain will go away. Or maybe it's because of a lack of conditioning. We'll see how it works out.

Without my satisfying run, I reached home in a foul mood. I tried to do pull-ups too, but out of the three pull-up bars I passed by on the way home, one was under construction and two were already occupied. I did some static exercises at home instead, maybe that'll help.

My mum called while I was exercising. She's in the United Kingdoms right now. It's a long story! Anyway, she called and she apologized over the phone about how she won't be home for my birthday.

Originally, this wouldn't bother me. But she was so damn apologetic about it, that after some time, it did bother me, and it sucked. I don't think much of birthday. I don't think much of "occasions" in general. Too much expectations...sometimes, it turns out to be just another day and you're left wanting after that.

I have ZERO expectations. But it's OTHER PEOPLE who have expectations, and it's some sort of peer expectation thing which influences me into having SOME expectations, and ultimately, some disappointments.

At the end of the day, I don't really feel much of celebrating my birthday this year. I'm still the same person. I haven't really changed. And what's more, I'm happy with my life as it is. My whole life is a fucking celebration, damn it.

Hmm, yeah, I'm sour over the bad run haha. Kay, I'm gonna shower.

Do what the fuck you want.

I had a look at my old blog yesterday, and I really liked what I read. I was so young back then, and I didn't have a clue what was going on but somehow, I made something nice. I guess that's life! You keep at something long enough, consistently enough, and something, whatever that is, will come out of it. And if it's something you like, your passion will show.

I felt a lot of passion from my old blog.

I'm going to abandon the How-To concept of this blog. It'll be How To from time to time, but not all the time. Sometimes, you just want to type away into a keyboard.

It's magical isn't it? You have a lot of thoughts in your head, but when you actually pen them down, or type them out, they become something more than thoughts. They begin to EXIST. And if you keep at it, your accumulated thought becomes who you are and what people think of you.

I once titled a blog post this: "I like how you don't know anything about me except for the things I choose to show you," I still believe it to this day. Nobody knows what kind of person we are if we do not take action which would reflect the kind of person we are. But before we take action, we first must think, and if we think hard about it enough, we can perceive how people will take us, as a result of that action.

You are who you want to be, is what I always say. When "Born This Way" by Lady Gaga came out, I hated it. It's a catchy song, true enough, but the message just grates me. Okay, so I understand that some people are born gay, born special, born with a fetish, whatever. What about stupid people, and irritating people, and fucked up people? Are you just gonna say that they were "born that way", and leave it at that?

No, people can change, and that's why if I had an anthem it would be called "Do what the fuck you want." and it'll be amazing.

That went off track very fast, but my thoughts just kept coming, and now we have this. It's not special, but it's something. Eventually, it'll be something special. Here's hoping.

How To Train for a Marathon: A Prologue of Sorts

I'm gonna be doing a How To Train for a Marathon post, seeing how I'm actually training for one at the moment. I'm short of time this evening however, so I'll just leave you with this piece from Haruki Murakami:

"But really as I run, I don't think much of anything worth mentioning.

I just run. I run in a void. Or maybe I should put it the other way: I run in order to acquire a void. But as you might expect, an occasional thought will slip into the void. People's minds can't be a complete blank. Human beings' emotions are not strong or consistent enough to sustain a vacuum. What I mean is, the kinds of thoughts and ideas that invade my emotions as I run remain subordinate to that void. Lacking content, they are just thoughts that gather around that central void.

The thoughts that occur to me while I'm running are like clouds in the sky. Clouds of all different sizes. They come and they go, while the sky remains the same sky as always. The clouds are mere guests in the sky that pass away and vanish, leaving behind the sky. The sky both exists and doesn't exist. It has substance and at the same time doesn't. And we merely accept that vast expanse and drink it in."

From his book, "What I Talk About When I Talk About Running".